In my Head
by ShippingCreek
Summary: It has been three years since Craig and Tweek moved out of South Park and now they are returning with a broken to bits relationship. Craig and Tweek both want to fix it, but do not know how, but both will soon learn that help and understanding can come from the weirdest places. Creek. Possible lemon.
1. Sepia

Craig let out another long, drawn out sigh as he puffed the end of his cigarette out the window of their apartment. Three years. The goddamn years they had been living in this stupid apartment and every year that's passed, Tweek promises they'll move. Another promise he doesn't keep. Craig used to be able to dismiss his boyfriends forgetfulness passively as 'cute' or 'naïve', but even Craig hidden in his own thoughts can admit he gets annoyed by Tweek's forgetfulness and his outbursts and his resisting to do this or persistance on doing that.

The darker haired boy let his cigarette fall to the street from floors and stories below him, closing his eyes. Tweek hated these things, maybe that was why he smoked them so often. Passive aggressive is how Craig worked best because it required little to no conversation, just passively being aggressive. He didn't realized he had been leaning over the railings of their walk-out-window staring down until he walked in.

"Tweek why are you so late? You fucking know how much I worry when you don't call me." Craig accused without much reason. It was more or less a reason to talk to him, they never talked anymore unless they were arguing or talking after sex. Early mornings were the only time, nowadays, that Craig can say he is actually happy at home. "Answer your phone." He deadpanned, kissing the boy's cheek quickly and walking passed him to the kitchen without another word.

Tweek watched the boy and shook his head, groaning. "I had to work over. I thought you'd be happy that I was getting more hours." He muttered. When they had moved into this apartment three years ago they had both promised to find a job to help pay for rent and food and all the neccessities. It wahd been like a dream to move out of South Park, even if it wasn't that far away. Just somewhere they could afford.

Tweek found a job doing what he found natural, working at a local Harbucks. He'd been offered a manager's position several times. This meant more money, which they needed, but Tweek would always refuse it, feeling that it would put too much pressure on him. This is another thing that fueled their fights.

As did Craig's lack of a job. He had a job at the local paper, but after about a year of nothing but delivery work he had quit. What Craig had wanted was to be a photographer. Tweek supported him quitting and also supported him getting another job, which he never did.

Tweek followed him into the kitchen. "Did you make dinner?" Tweek asked, instantly moving to the coffee pot to pour himself a hot cup of coffee. At least Craig had made coffee for him.

"M'mm." Craig barely answered, nodding to the coffee and a pot of soup on their tiny apartment stove. If Craig couldn't offer Tweek money or a decent relationship, he made up for it at least occasionally with his passion for cooking. He usually covered that, at least. What happened to them? Craig used to make him breakfast every morning and kiss him off to work... He supposed that was just back when things were normal. When they were happy, when Craig had a job and could help relieve Tweek of some of the pressure he had to deal with at work. Granted if Tweek could just take the managers position at work, a lot of their problems would just be solved already. He knew better than to bring it up, though.

"Potato soup with vegetables." He clarified only slightly. "Bread is still baking, so..." He trailed off, sipping his tea as Tweek attacked his coffee. Craig still made it for him every morning, as a force of habit. He thinks Tweek still holds that close, the gesture of making coffee for him all the time, but really it isn't even something Craig thinks about as a good gesture to his boyfriend anymore. It's just something he does without thinking. He wouldn't admit that either though.

Walking over to Tweek, Craig took the mail off the table that said boy had brought in from outside, flipping through it mindlessly

Tweek hesitated for a moment, thumbing over the edge of his coffee cup as he stared into its dark contents before speaking, "T-theres nothing to look at but bills." he muttered, closing his eyes. He was so tired, but not a regular tired. He was tired of life in this apartment. He was tired of working so hard on their relationship and their financial stature. He chewed on his lip again before speaking again, "Someone told me today that Wal-Mart is hiring in their photo center...someone to take pictures of people's kids. Maybe you could..." he started.

He stood and returned to the pot of coffee to pour himself another pot. "It'd really help if you got a job again and you'd get to take pictures there..." he told him. He remembered a time when Craig always had his camera. Every moment they spent together had been a photo capturing moment, filled with bright colors and wonderful memories. He idly mused about how now nothing had color. The world was in sepia.

He looked up at Craig, swallowing hard. "I-i'm barely making enough to pay rent and that's with all the over time I've been bringing in...maybe you could...just for a while." he said as he sat back down at their small table.

For some reason, this time Craig didn't feel a boiling in his stomach. He didn't snarl at the blond's words and turn around to bark about how he's been trying so very, very hard (lies) to get a job. He wasnt trying at all, and he knew it. It wasnt as if he didn't care, it was that until now, hearing Tweek speak with...what the fuck was it just now? ...Hurt? He knew things needed to change. This wasnt the first time he'd felt this though, he knew the feeling was guilt. This same feeling is exactly what happened back in High School when he found out Tweek had secretly been in love with him for years... Bent over heals, he had to even go as far as adding.

"..." He could sense Tweek's breaths becoming more rapid as he turned himself around and faced Tweek. This was always the sign that Craig would blow up. He was going to get in Tweek's face and yell at him, shouting about how much he tried and how much he puts up with. "...I don't know if I still got it in me." Craig mutters, sitting beside Tweek at the table and setting the mail on the table, absently noting but not caring about a Reminder-Letter for the two of them to visit the Doctor soon.

Tweek was a little surprised when Craig didn't start snapping about how he was trying and it was Tweek that wasn't. That he should take that managers position and everything would be solved. That's how it always went when Tweek suggested that Craig stared looking for a job again. The blonde boy knew that he had stopped a long time ago.

He sipped on his coffee, trying to hide how surprised he was that his raven haired lover would even talk with him about it. "Of course you do, Craig...something like that doesn't just go away. You might be a little rusty, but I bet you still have it in you." he attempted to reassure him.

He couldn't tell if he actually meant it or not. He just really wanted Craig to go apply for the job. How hard was it to snap a few pictures of a child and get a pay check at the end of the week? "I think you should apply for the job...maybe it'll help you get your photography back into shape." he said, giving a small smile.

He rolled his eyes, but mostly just at the compliments being thrown his way. Tweek knew that, he was sure. "Ugh... Yeah, maybe." He frowned, closing his eyes as he leaned back in his chair. "I'll wake up and take you to work in the morning, then apply I guess."

Craig had no idea where this was coming from, this kinder and less angry side of him, but... it felt nice not to argue. To not be mad and feel unheard by this boy that at one time he could honestly say he'd do anything for. Now Craig knows he just makes it a chore to act as though he loves him. "'m sure it's a better solution than you taking on more hours...y'work too many as it is, I don't see you anymore."

Tweek gave a small nod and then smiled, kissing the boy's cheek. "That's wonderful." he said, feeling a little less exhausted than he previously had. It might be nice to be able to have a day off once in a while now that Craig would have a job of his own. It might even give Tweek a chance to work on his writing, something that he'd missed terribly, but just couldn't find the time for it anymore.

He kissed the boy's cheek again as he got up for his third cup of coffee. He stopped mid way to the pot and inhaled deeply, scrunching up his nose. "Is something...burning?" he asked and then looked back at Craig.


	2. Opportunities

"Oh- Fuck!" He hissed.

Craig sat up and walked over quickly to the oven to reveal a burnt loaf of bread. He groaned, repressing the urge to get mad and throw it across the kitchen, and simply took it out and tossed it in the trash can. He didn't even bother to mention it again. "...Is work going okay?" He tried to turn the conversation, picking up the mail and tossing down all the bills but keeping two of the pieces of mail and placing them on the fridge side by side. One was the Doctors Appointment, and the other wasn't as much mail as it was a magazine clipping of the hiring Tweek was talking about. Hint-Hint.

Tweek decided it was best not to comment on the burnt loaf of bread. Instead, he stood and urged Craig to sit before pouring them both a bowl of soup. He set one in front of Craig before sitting in his seat with his own.

"Work? Oh, it's been okay..." he muttered, stirring his soup with his spoon as he talked. He opted not to tell Craig that he had once again been offered the managers position which he denied on the spot.

"How are things with you?" He muttered, trying to keep the conversation going as he sipped on his soup. He closed his eyes, letting the flavor wash over his tongue. This was something he missed as well. It was a rare occasion that Craig cook an actual meal like this. Usually, Tweek would come home to a freshly microwaved tv dinner.

"This soup is amazing." he commented.

A rare, faint smirk tingled on Craig's lips as he shrugged and sipped his own soup. "That's good." He commented, agreeing with Tweek internally that his soup turned out pretty amazing.

He opted not to answer Tweek's question, because there wasn't much of an answer. He basically sits around the apartment all day while Tweek works and pays bills. Craig didn't have much responsibility other than keeping the apartment clean and cooking for Tweek. He was getting so tired of this same routine... But tonight he is going to make an effort not to argue.

The two sat in silence for sometimes, which left Tweek to gnaw on his lower lip in between swallowfuls of the soup. He looked up at the boy and sighed, leaning back in his chair. "Craig...things aren't like they used to be, huh?" he whispered, closing his eyes.

"We're not like we used to be either...W-we used to be happy." he said, letting his hands fall in his lap and nervously squeeze his knees. "We used to l-love each other..."

Craig frowned, normal expression seeping back into place at Tweek's words. Craig knew Tweek was right, he simply shook his head. Sighing tiredly, Craig leaned over into his knees and placed a hand on top of Tweek's nervous ones. "I...still love you, Tweek." It sounded foreign to say that now...when did it become foreign? "We just have a lot going on, I guess." Truth was he didn't know what to say to that.

Tweek closed his eyes and stood after a moment, "I-I'm really exhausted from work." he muttered, heading towards their small bathroom. He shut the door behind him and turned on the shower.

It felt nice to let the hot water run over him and for a short time drown any fears or burdens he was carrying. The feeling never lasted long, only the time he spent in the shower, but it was still heavenly.

When he finished, he opened the door to the bathroom and headed towards their bed. He lied in his side, pushing his face in his pillow.

Craig had beaten Tweek there, stripped and already nearly half asleep as Tweek came to bed. Normally Craig was angry at this point of the night, but seeing as tonight he wasn't mad, he had a clear mind. When was the last time he tried to help Tweek calm down?

"..." He shifts under the covers and lifts a little, watching Tweek as he twitched and shivered in place trying to get comfortable. "...hey, c'mere." Craig murmured, gently pulling a very exhausted Tweek into one arm and against his chest. "...I really do love you, Tweek. I'm sorry we've...lost our spark." He guesses that's the word he was looking for. It just felt so weird to say considering they used to be so happy a few years back, and only a day ago Craig was sleeping on the couch because of an argument they'd had prior. This was probably the first time Craig has put forth the effort to cuddle with Tweek like couple. He hoped it helped somehow

Tweek was taken by surprise by this suddeny action and had to suppress the urge to fight the boy away, but after a few moments of mental arguing with himself he allowed himself to be taken in completely by Craig's embrace. He nuzzled his face into his chest and inhaled deeply. Craig still smelt the way he did in high school, like smoke and axe. It was an odd combination that Tweek loved.

They were never intimate like this, not even in their sexual relationship. It was more just the action and need for sexual relief then anything. At least that was how Tweek felt. Craig didn't make him feel the way he did in high school when they were under the covers.

He bit his lip and laid in silence before speaking once again, "It's Butter's birthday this weekend...were we still going to go to his party?" he asked. Butters had been Tweek's friend all through high school and they still kept in touch. He hoped Craig would still want to go.

Craig was wide awake, but closed his eyes anyway so to give Tweek an illusion of being tired. He sat up slightly and held Tweek close to his side. "I guess so." He murmured. "'s important to you, isn't it?"

Craig never slept now-a-days. Without school or a job to occupy him, he basically slept all day and stayed up all night. This was particularly hard when they fought, because Tweek was extra exhausted and they had no time to even release sexual tension, let alone physical or emotional. He has to admit he misses this whole...cuddling thing.

Craig kissed Tweeks head softly, rubbing his shoulder as he did so.

Tweek nodded, "I haven't seen Butters in a while." he muttered, looking up at the boy. He shuddered as he felt the tension and stress in his shoulders start to melt. Craig was acting awfully...strange to say the least. He never did things like this for Tweek anymore.

"Um, Craig...a-are you feeling okay?" Tweek asked, gnawing once again on the bottom of his lip nervously. "I-it's just that...you're being really affectionate tonight." Immediately after these words escape the blonde boy's mouth he is beating himself up mentally for it.

/You're such an idiot. Now he's going to get angry. You can't even keep one good fucking moment, can you? So stupid./

"Is it bad?" Craig asked, half serious but mostly just sarcastically. This was out of character, yes, but it wasn't bad right? This just meant that for whatever reason, Craig decided he was going to act like a boyfriend should... "I can stop, I just kind of felt like it."

"I-i didn't mean that it was bad, its just not something I'd expect from you." Tweek responded, closing his eyes. He rolled onto his side and comfortably pressed himself against the boy, yawning.

He always found himself tired when he got home, as opposed to his days in high school where he had the worst time falling asleep.

"Good night Craig." he whispered.

Craig sighed and nodded, trying to find a comfortable position and actually finding one in laying his head atop of Tweeks. It'd been forever since they'd fallen asleep together like this. "...Night." He replied, though he knew he wouldn't be sleeping any time soon. It was kind of ironic how that worked out, Tweek sleeping and Craig not, its like High School reversed itself.

After a few hours, Craig finally did drift off and it was 4 hours before they awoke to Craig's cell phone alarm going off nearby. When Craig woke up, he found that Tweek was still curled up to his side, small and self conscious but...happy? He seemed happy... Holy shit, was that even a smile? He decided to shut off the alarm and lay in bed for a few more minutes, seeing as they didn't need to be awake for another hour.

Tweek had heard the alarm go off, but didn't move to get up or even open his eyes. He knew that if he did it would be time to go to work and time to move out of Craig's arms. After another thirty minutes he finally sat up.

"I have to get ready for work." he muttered, standing and grabbing his work clothes out of the closet. He looked back at Craig as he did so, smiling weakly.

"You're still going to look at that job, right? Don't worry...you'll do great, i bet." he said, retuning to the bed to kiss his cheek before changing.

Yeah, I am." He muttered, getting up as well and changing into his usual attire of skinny jeans and some t-shirt. He never did get out of that phase, he supposed. The whole 'cool kid scene' look, that is. He even dyed his hair black still, because he hated the color brown it was naturally. "I don't really have a choice anyway." He added, pulling on his black and white converse and heading out of the room. This work shit better go over well.

Tweek watched him for a moment and sighed, pulling on the rest of his work clothes before following the boy out of the room and into the kitchen. He quickly started a pot of coffee before rubbing his eyes.

He was so tired. Working so much had really gotten to him. He sat at the table as the smell of coffee made its way through the air. The good news was it was Thursday and it was the last day that he worked until Monday. It would be nice not to work for so long.

When his coffee finished he poured himself a cup and sat down once again, letting the scalding hot liquid pour over his tongue.

Craig leaned against the table with his morning tea and closed his eyes, tired as well since normally he was able to sleep longer than the four hours his developed insomnia allows him. It's falling asleep that's hard, not the actual act of sleeping like most people think. He gets that now, especially after being with Tweek for so long.

After he finished his tea he washed the mug and put it away, waiting for Tweek together his thermos. "I hope you're right about this job, because I'm not too confident." He muttered.

Tweek gave a small smile to the boy and an encouraging peck on the cheek before opening the door that led out of the apartment. "I'm sure you'll do great. You're a natural behind the camera." he told him.

He took his hand as they headed to Craig's car. Tweek had never learned to drive. He'd tried once with Craig, but after a few hours of close encounters Tweek's anxiety was through the roof. He never tried again.

When they reached Harbucks, Tweek opened the car door and got out, saying good bye to the black haired boy. He then wished him good luck before walking into Harbucks to start his day.


End file.
